Moving back to Osaka Japan was a dream come true. I can't imagine myself doing anything else. That being said I'm really no different from you who are reading these blog posts. God calls all Christians to serve, that being said we are all still human. As I got into Japan jet lagged and on a rainy day. The sights, sounds, and culture around me suddenly being very different from what I had grown used to while back in the states quickly began to make me feel a lot of different emotions. Sleep was difficult the first few days.
Within the first days I had managed to change my address, get my visa card, change bank branches, get a new bike, register that bike, and by insurance for it. I also set up a new phone number, took language tests to place into a Japanese language School, started class, and began getting ready for a Pastor's retreat. Needless to say I jumped back in feet first. I felt like I was back home in terms of work, but I did not feel settled at all for about the first month. It was tough being in a shoebox hotel which on the one hand was super nice yet really small, but on the other hand not my home. I quickly began to realize that I was allowing something so small and minute in the grand scheme of things to begin to take most of my attention. I wasn't settled. I wasn't home. I think it was about the 2nd week, that as I was grumbling to myself having to do laundry at a coin laundromat, wishing I was in my apartment the Holy Spirit grabbed my heart. It's like I could here Him say "look I know the situation isn't ideal, I know you're tired, stressed, and jet lagged. I know you have all the emotions in full force right now. I know that you are trying. I need you to know I am with you. I have called you and guess what, that means I am going to provide what you need and when you need it. I am enough. You have a roof over your head, food in your stomach, you're back in japan, and on a great team. Just relax, experience the emotion...I made them so be honest with yourself and me. Just don't let them take over, give them to me I can handle it. Your apartment is already yours you just need to wait." Man talk about a reality check. I got prideful in my heart and began saying I deserve help from others, I deserve to be in my apartment now. I allowed my wants to overshadow the opportunities God had given me. The hotel I was in was in my old neighborhood. I was able to connect with friends, take time to get everything I needed for my apartment bought and squared away. The few times I had to do laundry that first month I almost always got to talk with people. The last time I was able to speak a full conversation and get to know a cab driver that I wouldn't have met otherwise. In those moments I realized I was just being crabby cause I wanted to. I was humbled, and realized that God is so much greater than me, and His ways and timing is the best. Its not something I've mastered but day by day I'm growing. The bible passage He used to humble me was one my Dad made sure I was aware of Philippians 4:4-7 CSB “Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your graciousness be known to everyone. The Lord is near. Don’t worry about anything, but in everything, through prayer and petition with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.” He brought this verse, songs, and other verses to mind to help me gain a better perspective. I was humbled and realized that I was just having a spiritual tantrum so to speak and God patiently guided me back to a better place. I know my term has just started and that there will absolutely be more ups and downs but I already see how God is moving and can't wait to write again. If you're reading this know that I love you, God loves you and wants the best for you. I'd love to get in contact with you so feel free to subscribe to the blog in the contact section, to receive emails alerting you to any new posts or contact me via any of the given methods on the contact section!
Ps low key this
my first try at blogging so feel free to let me know your thoughts and just know that it will change as I get better at it.
-Jacob
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